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Old 11-15-2017, 08:17 AM   #991
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You and your wife are probably out at the desert right now. At least I hope so; hope you are able to relax a little and have some good quality conversation/fun. I know it is a place that you used to enjoy being and hope that you enjoy it this time too, find some peace. I know it won't be quite the same with all that's going on with you. I just don't have the words to say, can't imagine what you and your wife are feeling. I am so glad that you stay as positive as you do and keep your faith. I hope you both had a good time today.

I stayed home, inside all day except to get out and walk for my hour. Temp in the 30s. Chicken wasn't thawed so put it off until tomorrow. Just had a cup of soup & moz cheese for both lunch and dinner so came in around 700 cals for the day and maybe 50 carbs. Tomato soup is kinda up there in carbs. DH had tortilla fiesta soup, even higher & also 4 pieces bread/butter & crackers. I know we have all accepted that we can't just eat all the crappy carbs we want but it still always seems 'weird' to watch those normal people eat it all and never gain an extra ounce. And seem quite healthy to boot. DUH.
Hi Kris Just got back from the desert. It was nice. Rode the ebike. Had a few beers, but no dinner. In the past, when got home I'd want an order of nachos.

Last night I passed on dinner too. If I feel like my stomach isn't gonna process it well, then i'd rather opt for a safer night's sleep.


October 22: --------------------------239.2
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October 28----------------------------237.3
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November 5---------------------------232.7
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November 10----------------------- --232.1
November 11--------------------------232.1
November 12--------------------------233.8
November 15--------------------------230.6

The ales were fun, but I don't have the capacity to pound em like I used to. Sounds like you're still trying. An hour walk is great!! Any more good results? Or treading water?

Well it's amazing how clean my thought life is these days. Nothing like preparing to meet one's Maker to make one realize how unclean their thought life is.

At least for me. Men's minds tend to wonder off into bad stuff. But now I immediately catch it and tell myself to think on things above, not on things below. What so ever things are pure, lovely, of a good report, think on these things.

If I thought I was gonna live another 25 years, then i might toy with a bad thought life. Now I see God standing right before me and I want to avoid evil because it does not please God. So I like how much easier it is to obey God when I know I'm in the position of not being able to get away with it.

Isn't it just so interesting how God puts us here and then He hides Himself from us? He gives us freedom to live how ever we want. And because people don't see Him with their eyes, they can behave as if He does not exist. And Christians can do the same. I have. Now I am busy repenting every day, and if feels right and I like it.

Well, I have become more popular of late. I'm like the kid who got his tonsils taken out and everyone comes to see him in the hospital. Where was all this love before he got sick?

The attention is nice, I do feel loved. I am using this time as a platform to challenge my brothers to think more in light of eternity. We tend to get (as the bible says) "caught up in the cares of this life." And it's not wrong to take care of things, it's necessary. But often we find ourselves too busy for God.

We find ourselves living for ourselves more than living for God. Why is that? As if He's to be avoided because He requires holiness from us. Yes, He requires it and He has taken care of all the times we have been unholy as well. God is good.
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Old 11-16-2017, 06:01 AM   #992
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Glad you and DW were able to get some R&R, exercise and even a few ales. Sounds like fun. And down to 230! I realize weightloss is not your main focus right now but congrats anyhow.

Yes, I'm still trying, maybe doing slightly better then treading water but no loss to brag about. I finally got back down after the bounce up from all the Veterans dinners & beer last weekend.

Roast chicken yesterday & the leftovers today so keeping it LC. Not sure if I'll get a chance to walk but hoping to, may have to be at the mall. I am trying hard to work on getting better sleep, but no matter what I do I keep waking up tossing and turning all night, can't go back to sleep.
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Old 11-16-2017, 08:43 AM   #993
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Glad you and DW were able to get some R&R, exercise and even a few ales. Sounds like fun. And down to 230! I realize weightloss is not your main focus right now but congrats anyhow.

Yes, I'm still trying, maybe doing slightly better then treading water but no loss to brag about. I finally got back down after the bounce up from all the Veterans dinners & beer last weekend.

Roast chicken yesterday & the leftovers today so keeping it LC. Not sure if I'll get a chance to walk but hoping to, may have to be at the mall. I am trying hard to work on getting better sleep, but no matter what I do I keep waking up tossing and turning all night, can't go back to sleep.
Yes Kris keep up that walking. Have you tried melatonin for sleep. Totally safe stuff. It's not like a sleeping pill. It's natural.

I doubt you'd want to or even could get a hold of an Indica tincture. That stuff will make you sleep and it would kill cancer cells too. Plus it's just good for the body's endo cannabinoidal system. I'm sure I spelled that wrong.

I'm taking this new product called Salacinium. Spelled wrong I'm sure. It's a fake sugar molecule with another molecule attached to it. Normal cells reject it, but anerrobic cells (cancer cells, some viruses, etc.) take it in along with the other molecule (a long name that isn't good for cancer cells).

Without boring you with the details, it throws things off for the cancer. Mine is an oral form. The IV bags are $575 a piece. And you're supposed to go thru 21 sessions once a day. That's a lot of cash. Not to mention time as well.

Talking about better sleep, I put my infra-red heating pad in bed last night. That kept the one area that affects the heart area from bothering me.

Well Kris I hope you hang on to your new mojo and keep on goin. Don't worry about losing fast. Just learn a better way to eat and drink.
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Old 11-17-2017, 08:00 AM   #994
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Good Morning! Just tried to walk but it I got a mile away and it started sleeting in my face, I'm soaked. Had to get back home walking in the sleet. Cant run due to really sore heel from the plantar faciacious or however you spell it. Guess I'm falling apart.

Skipped dinner so down a pound today I think At least it seemed like it but I weighed early before coffee I will try the melatonin you suggested, I had read that too, just hadn't been out to get anything yet.

Wow that's some expensive IV bags for you. Hope it works

Not much to report, a boring gray cold sleeting day. It's Friday so may go out for a burger and broccoli but if not I've got lots of LC food I've been cooking lately. Boiling chicken carcass right now for bone broth soup, no carbs added except small celery L& onion
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Old 11-17-2017, 08:26 AM   #995
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Good Morning! Just tried to walk but it I got a mile away and it started sleeting in my face, I'm soaked. Had to get back home walking in the sleet. Cant run due to really sore heel from the plantar faciacious or however you spell it. Guess I'm falling apart.

Skipped dinner so down a pound today I think At least it seemed like it but I weighed early before coffee I will try the melatonin you suggested, I had read that too, just hadn't been out to get anything yet.

Wow that's some expensive IV bags for you. Hope it works

Not much to report, a boring gray cold sleeting day. It's Friday so may go out for a burger and broccoli but if not I've got lots of LC food I've been cooking lately. Boiling chicken carcass right now for bone broth soup, no carbs added except small celery L& onion
Sounds good. Hi Kris Keep up the good attitude.
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Old 11-18-2017, 06:37 AM   #996
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Saturday morning in drizzly gray Illinois. Can't walk outside - OK going to HAVE to get the exercise bike plugged in & set up, I've been dragging my feet Fridays are kind of my "official weigh day" even tho I tend to weigh every day and I was the same as last week as yesterday. So no loss, but also no gain with all of those Veteran's festivities/buffetts I attended so I'm not totally bummed but also not thrilled I had bounced up and it took all week to get back to my low.

I've gotten a little better at holding back/passing up the good stuff when out but still need improvement. Had the burger basket at our favorite burger joint last night and swapped the awesome fries for the not so awesome broccoli but still ate most of the bun and washed it down with beer Didn't over do on the beer tho, only stayed out a couple of hours. Also just had chicken broth for lunch so had some jiggle room I don't plan on going out much the rest of the weekend.

Hope you get to enjoy your weekend GB
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Old 11-18-2017, 09:52 AM   #997
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Saturday morning in drizzly gray Illinois. Can't walk outside - OK going to HAVE to get the exercise bike plugged in & set up, I've been dragging my feet Fridays are kind of my "official weigh day" even tho I tend to weigh every day and I was the same as last week as yesterday. So no loss, but also no gain with all of those Veteran's festivities/buffetts I attended so I'm not totally bummed but also not thrilled I had bounced up and it took all week to get back to my low.

I've gotten a little better at holding back/passing up the good stuff when out but still need improvement. Had the burger basket at our favorite burger joint last night and swapped the awesome fries for the not so awesome broccoli but still ate most of the bun and washed it down with beer Didn't over do on the beer tho, only stayed out a couple of hours. Also just had chicken broth for lunch so had some jiggle room I don't plan on going out much the rest of the weekend.

Hope you get to enjoy your weekend GB
Well thank you Kris. So you're getting better at holding off on the food and drinks that are bad for you. I'm hoping that you're getting better at it in the sense that you view these foods as sinister.

It's going to be nearly impossible to leave these bad choices behind if you still view them as your friend or as friendly items. "Look at that beautiful burger sitting there waiting to be consumed." No. It's actually NOT beautiful for you.

For others, yes. For you no. I need to heed my own advice. Beer still looks wonderful to me.

Yesterday I got my first IV infusion of this Salicinium stuff. Sounds promising. I'm going to see a Chinese guy today. His English is broken. I have no idea what he offers, but I guess he did wonders for one cancer patient.

I like anything the FDA does not approve of. Lol. If it isn't the American way, it probably works better. We are so messed up here in America ever since medicine turned it's nose against plants and herbs and opted for man-made substances that we call medicine today.

I'll let you know how it goes.
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Old 11-18-2017, 11:46 AM   #998
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yes GB let me know how it goes. I it goes well for you. And yes, the fries didn't tempt me, I'm starting to see them as the enemy and I liked the broccoli OK; I'd do that again. But the burger was still great to me - guess I haven't put burgers on the "bad" list yet as I associate them with LC??

Today I put shredded chicken breast in a pan with a little butter, topped with 1 strip bacon, smidge of bar B Q sauce, then Monterey Jack cheese and grilled it all, even flipped it. It was really good and LC. Made same for DH only on buttered bread & grilled like a gourmet grilled cheese. He loved it with some stovetop stuffing. I'm hoping to not eat again today. We are staying home watching HBO movies all day since it's FREE HBO weekend here

I did try the melatonin last night - took it at 9, went to bed at 10 & fell asleep OK but awake at 12:15 and didn't fall back asleep ALL night. I'm really having a tough time sleeping. Hate just laying there tossing and turning and thinking about stuff I don't want to think about. Now I just feel like laying around all day. Its nasty out anyway.
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Old 11-18-2017, 12:25 PM   #999
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yes GB let me know how it goes. I it goes well for you. And yes, the fries didn't tempt me, I'm starting to see them as the enemy and I liked the broccoli OK; I'd do that again. But the burger was still great to me - guess I haven't put burgers on the "bad" list yet as I associate them with LC??

Today I put shredded chicken breast in a pan with a little butter, topped with 1 strip bacon, smidge of bar B Q sauce, then Monterey Jack cheese and grilled it all, even flipped it. It was really good and LC. Made same for DH only on buttered bread & grilled like a gourmet grilled cheese. He loved it with some stovetop stuffing. I'm hoping to not eat again today. We are staying home watching HBO movies all day since it's FREE HBO weekend here

I did try the melatonin last night - took it at 9, went to bed at 10 & fell asleep OK but awake at 12:15 and didn't fall back asleep ALL night. I'm really having a tough time sleeping. Hate just laying there tossing and turning and thinking about stuff I don't want to think about. Now I just feel like laying around all day. Its nasty out anyway.
I thought u were talking about a burger with a bun.

How many milligrams of mel did you take? Standard is 3mg per capsule. Keep upping the dose until you sleep. Some people take 5 or 6 caps a night. I was taking 4. But the Indica is stronger than melatonin, so I've been using two caps a night. Don't need as much.
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Old 11-18-2017, 12:51 PM   #1000
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How many milligrams of mel did you take? Standard is 3mg per capsule. Keep upping the dose until you sleep. Some people take 5 or 6 caps a night. I was taking 4. But the Indica is stronger than melatonin, so I've been using two caps a night. Don't need as much.
I'll have to ask my friend. He gave me some of his since I've been having so much trouble sleeping. The 2 nights before I tried taking allergy medicines and then last night tried his melatonin. It was in gummy bears and I took two.
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Old 11-18-2017, 08:03 PM   #1001
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I'll have to ask my friend. He gave me some of his since I've been having so much trouble sleeping. The 2 nights before I tried taking allergy medicines and then last night tried his melatonin. It was in gummy bears and I took two.
Ok. Probably 6 grams then. But until you know what your taking, maybe just up in one tonight.

You can't really hurt yourself with it. Those who take large amounts sometimes report more vivid and real like dreams.

Well my DW went to a Thanksgiving party where lots of my wealthy clients get together this time of year. I was there last year and didn't like getting so much attention due to the new diagnosis.

I was planning on going anyway, but my days just aren't about going out anymore. It's all about management of the disease now.

Oh, I saw the Chinese guy. Turns out he was Vietnamese. Really hard to understand his English. He checked my pulse on both wrists and said I had cancer in the kidneys and liver. He looked troubled. Then he went on about the medicine he "knows" I will need.

Problem is it comes from China and might not be available. Could cost thousands if it is. I'm very leery to say the least. His supposed correct guess about cancer location could have come from my wife telling over the phone, that it had spread everywhere.
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Old 11-20-2017, 04:55 AM   #1002
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Good Morning! I can understand why you might want to avoid a party where everybody knows what you are battling and will be commenting about it. Even tho they mean well, nobody knows what to say and can't truly imagine what you are going through. At least I can't. Hopefully we can just help each other in here somehow with our quick daily reports and hello's

I didn't get on scale yet today. I suspect a bounce up as yesterday had a pretty huge bar BQ sandwhich for dinner. Swapped my sides, baked bns & pot salad for cole slaw & broccoli tho. Did good LC all day Sat, never left the house. But after tracking & logging last night's dinner I found it was really high in carbs with the sugary barBQ sauce & a few bites of the awesome bun. I still do look at those kinds of things as "really good" but am also getting use to trading out things, ordering better, cutting number of beers, etc. Maybe that is the happy medium I'll end up with. I'm kinda getting to LIKE the broccoli and be glad I swapped it for the baked beans or fries.

Got 2 boys to babysit today and we might make cookies together so may not end well!
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Old 11-20-2017, 09:16 AM   #1003
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Good Morning! I can understand why you might want to avoid a party where everybody knows what you are battling and will be commenting about it. Even tho they mean well, nobody knows what to say and can't truly imagine what you are going through. At least I can't. Hopefully we can just help each other in here somehow with our quick daily reports and hello's

I didn't get on scale yet today. I suspect a bounce up as yesterday had a pretty huge bar BQ sandwhich for dinner. Swapped my sides, baked bns & pot salad for cole slaw & broccoli tho. Did good LC all day Sat, never left the house. But after tracking & logging last night's dinner I found it was really high in carbs with the sugary barBQ sauce & a few bites of the awesome bun. I still do look at those kinds of things as "really good" but am also getting use to trading out things, ordering better, cutting number of beers, etc. Maybe that is the happy medium I'll end up with. I'm kinda getting to LIKE the broccoli and be glad I swapped it for the baked beans or fries.

Got 2 boys to babysit today and we might make cookies together so may not end well!
Hi Kris Sounds like you're growing. Coming out of the fog. Keep it up. Don't eat those cookies.

I know the people mean well, it just gets like the person whose leg is in a cast. At first you don't mind telling the story. But yeah, they mean well and they care about me. I'd just rather be normal and having a glass of wine like everyone else.

I had a little organic beef last night. Ground beef with taco kind of spices. Sure tasted good. It was the first normal kind of food in weeks. Funny how amazing things taste after you have done time in food jail.

I managed the indigestion from my small dinner with my liquid peppermint, etc drops. So nice to not have to rely on pharma drugs for every problem that confronts the human body. The peppermint it's self is another cancer fighter.

I haven't been posting my weight because it stays the same as my stomach swells with fibrous tumors. I'm shrinking as my tumors grow. These last ditch efforts MUST work or I'm in for some kind of short road to heaven.

I slept well last night. It feels so good to lay down. Cancer is like the flu. During the day it's tolerable, but at night you start to feel like you just don't want anymore awake time. So when I hit the bed with the heating pad already hot, I just melt. Ahhhhh.....feels so good.

But yeah, it was a really good night for me. It will be so great if this cancer halts it's progress and I get some privileges back. Like being able to sleep in my old favorite positions.

Back to the clinic today for another IV bag. It's expensive, but I had to pull the trigger on something bigger than mere oral remedies.
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Old 11-21-2017, 07:41 AM   #1004
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Yes, out of the fog a little bit, trying hard at least. Didn't eat any cookies Been avoiding alcohol to try and get better sleep. Last night 5 hours. Can't really tell what is helping and what isn't yet.

We have Thanksgiving plans Wed night, Thurs & Friday so lots of eating for me, as with everyone I suppose. It's a nice family time of the year. The weather here got disappointing very early, I've had to quit walking outside and with more babysitting not getting any exercise to speak of. Maybe get to the mall tonight to walk around there but it's not much fun. We have already decided to go to Daytona for 8 weeks next Winter (2019) when the babysitting is over.

Today more chicken soup. Had a really low calorie day yesterday, been kinda doing every other day really low. Can't seem to get below 143 tho. I'm still shooting for 130 but stuck. I expect progress to be slow around the holidays even tho I've been pretty good. Lots of Intermittent fasting and dinner skipping!!
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Old 11-21-2017, 08:57 AM   #1005
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Yes, out of the fog a little bit, trying hard at least. Didn't eat any cookies Been avoiding alcohol to try and get better sleep. Last night 5 hours. Can't really tell what is helping and what isn't yet.

We have Thanksgiving plans Wed night, Thurs & Friday so lots of eating for me, as with everyone I suppose. It's a nice family time of the year. The weather here got disappointing very early, I've had to quit walking outside and with more babysitting not getting any exercise to speak of. Maybe get to the mall tonight to walk around there but it's not much fun. We have already decided to go to Daytona for 8 weeks next Winter (2019) when the babysitting is over.

Today more chicken soup. Had a really low calorie day yesterday, been kinda doing every other day really low. Can't seem to get below 143 tho. I'm still shooting for 130 but stuck. I expect progress to be slow around the holidays even tho I've been pretty good. Lots of Intermittent fasting and dinner skipping!!
Wow, you avoided the cookies. How did that make you feel as you made them, smelled them bake, etc.....and then said NO to them?

That's a real success story Kris!!! Sounds like you gotta plan.

You said that maybe you'd walk around the mall, but it's not much fun. I'm becoming more fascinated by how we define "fun." One person's fun is another person's dull time.

A friend of mine wants to visit me, so I suggested the best way is to visit me at the clinic while i'm sitting there trying to pass the time for the IV to frip thru.

He said he guessed he could do that, but it didn't sound like much fun. Guys want to get together for lunch or over beer, but just straight up apparently isn't fun.

So fun seems to involve pleasure. When pizza hits the mouth and the pleasure center of the brain is wowed by the new input, we say that we are having fun.

I have had to do a lot of learning of late about how to get thru a day without much fun. It's a weird discipline.

What about truth? We might not normally think about truth much. We sort of assume that we know whats true about life. The ancients thought the world was flat and that various gods and goddesses controlled the weather, etc.

We now know the truth about the earth being round and that the weather is controlled by various conditions arising that don't require weather gods to manage. Some of us are pretty confident that Science has delivered us from superstitions and the pursuit of truth has been dealt with for us.

So instead of valuing that which is true, we value that which is fun. Or at least, it can be out of balance. Jesus said "you shall know the truth and the truth shall make you free."

Over and over again during His earthly ministry, He would say "I tell you the truth..." Then He'd declare to them something that was true about God and or life that they were ignorant of. The three years that He and the disciples were together was little more than a grand pursuit of truth.

The question arises: was that pursuit fun? Or is fun to frivolous a term to be applied in that context? With all my fun things to do in life being challenged by the cancer, I am forced to look deeper into the meaning of life. Why are we here? To do what?

Sports players will say before a big game "we're just gonna go out there and play hard and have fun." Perhaps we have made the pursuit of fun too important? We get devastated when we can't find anything fun to do.
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Old 11-22-2017, 09:42 AM   #1006
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Happy almost Thanksgiving Kris and PAC Where is PAC anyway? Is she posting elsewhere? Hope she didn't fall over dead.

October 22: --------------------------239.2
October 23: --------------------------238.7

October 28----------------------------237.3
October 29----------------------------236.2
October 30----------------------------237.2

November 5---------------------------232.7
November 6---------------------------233.2

November 10----------------------- --232.1
November 11--------------------------232.1
November 12--------------------------233.8
November 15--------------------------230.6
November 22--------------------------229.0

Well what do ya know? Finally 230 is broken.

Yesterday my wife and I talked to an integrative oncology nurse with expertise in the field of cannabis medicine. Cost $175 for an hour consultation. She gave us an extra 45 mins and would have given more.

Wow, what a difference between her and my doctor at the clinic. This woman was so well informed and helpful. The clinic runs more like a business instead of a staff of people who really want to see you get better.

That's why they pushed that super expensive cannabis vitamin on us. It's about products and making money. Which isn't wrong in and of it's self, unless information is withheld from the patient because the clinic doesn't sell it. Know what I mean?

And after the call last night, I suddenly realized that the alternative world of medicine probably goes too far in vilifying conventional medicine. This nurse (Kristen), spends her research on things that really work, not things that are more of a carpet bomb approach.

My wife and I both began to see that we were just playing the fools once more by getting salicinium IVs. Kristen said she hasn't seen any evidence that it works. She said she wouldn't waste her money on it.

Being a cannabis expert (she doesn't sell any products--so unlike the clinic, she is just trying to help us on a consulting level) it looks like one of my greatest hopes for improvement is lots of cannabis.

Not smoking so much as ingesting the various forms of cannabis extract as medicine, that given high enough doses can be effective against my cancer.

So that's where our money will go next. Gonna up the cannabis. Too bad it doesn't provide a good buzz.

I cancelled the IV today. It was just a $12,000 grasping at straws kind of thing. Probably would have lowered my Nagalase numbers, but then we'd be informed that another round of IVs is required. Best we cut and ran after 3 IV's.

Hope you have a nice Thanksgiving.
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